It was a warm evening last night so I bought myself a frozen yoghurt. I would have preferred ice cream but there are now five Frozen Yoghurt bars near my house and they’ve worn me down.
Frozen yoghurt is our latest attempt to turn a ‘sometimes’ food into an ‘all the time’ food. It may contain far fewer calories than ice cream but the one I ordered also had far less taste. It must also be pointed out that the health benefits were tempered by the buffet of crumbled biscuits, lollies and chocolates I was encouraged to garnish my frozen yoghurt with.
Soft drinks have been bastardised in the same way, replaced with low calorie, diet soft drinks. My mum has never been keen on them. ‘If you’re going to have a coke just have a real one.’ she says. ‘Don’t drink all those black chemicals’.
Mum is from an era where coke was a special treat though. People indulged far less often. If they had a soft drink, they’d made a day of it and sit opposite each other with bendy straws, looking into each others eyes and laughing. I’ve seen photos.
In the modern world you can buy a slab at the supermarket for 10 bucks and pop one open with every meal. Without a ‘diet’ option, we’d all be clinically obese. Mercifully we can now choose between obesity and artificial chemicals. My friend Sian, an avid diet soft drinker, articulates her choice as such ‘yeah, it will probably give me cancer but at least I won’t be fat’.
And what about hamburgers? Has their integrity been maintained in the modern world? No way. Grill’d now offer a burger served in a ‘low carb super bun’. Sure, it looks like a pappadum but with less than 10 per cent of the carbs of a normal bun but it means you will be able to indulge more often! Mum would call that a ‘Claytons hamburger’.
We may be saving calories left, right and centre but what is the cost? Next hot day, just have an ice cream. If more people did, the old Dairy Bell might still be in business.